Friday, May 30, 2014

The Mirror Selfie

I looked into a mirror, the reflection was distorted
It was beyond recognition, my recognition atleast
I saw a person, she was sitting in my very chair
her hair were different, her eyes looked into mine.
I did not recognize the face i know, but the eyes
the eyes looked like they could have been mine
I looked deep within, I lost what I had seen
Something looked different, although the same
Dilated; the pupils looked into the distance,
I tried to follow their gaze, but i lost sight
The sight of the eyes atleast, the lost eyes.
They were neither happy nor were they sad.
They were searching but not yet mourning.
There had been losses for a long time now
And the mourn from the gaze had gone
The pity had long evaporated into nothing
Confidence long crushed underneath
Something I saw emerge,
I saw a picture of me taken 2 decades ago
I smiled for I did not know that girl
She was happy I could tell
Her smile was not reflected in mine.
I saw a picture of me taken 2 years ago
I smiled for i believed I looked pretty
The picture made me look pretty I believe
I was happy then too,
The smile was genuinely reflecting me.
But the reflection was extremely distorted
Distorted by memory and belief
The self I was looking at repeated
What I thought I was supposed to be.
As I whirled my chair round and round
Slowly disorienting from the reality
I caught a glimpse of a reflection in the mirror,
The reflection which was not supposed to be me
I saw a girl who was smiling broad,
As she looked upon her self,
The mirror still distorted though
Imaged me as myself.
It was not beyond recognition
Nor was she looking into the distance.
She slowly looked into my eyes,
This time truly they were mine.
She smiled that happy smile
The smile I recounted in pictures too.
And getting up from the chair,
She walked towards the mirror blue
As she came closer to the surface,
I could see through her more and more,
I saw her dissolve slowly before me.
As she became one with all the air.
All I could see now was a mirror
It had left me a canvas blank
For me to be any me, that I could dare.




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